Back to the Norm…For now.

Posted by: amberhines on: July 20, 2010

• In: American Idol - Nashville
• 1 Comment

Well…today is my first day back to work since my exciting weekend.  I took a vacation day yesterday to recoup from all the festivities I encountered.  I would like to thank my biggest supporters:  Family, Church, and friends/coworkers.  I have already told my family/friends and they were all shocked and disappointed of the outcome of the audition, but I let them all know that I’m ok with the final result.  It just wasn’t meant to happen this way and I accept that decision.  I had to tell my coworkers today and they are all shocked and disappointed in the outcome too (but Lisa is just upset cause there’s no road trip to Cali in the future, LOVE YOU Lisa!).  Next is to tell my church friends that knew I was going, but don’t know how it turned out.  This is going to be the hardest I think.  I’m not sure why.  I think because these people hear me sing almost every week and I don’t want to be failure to them (I know I won’t be, but trying convince myself of that is not easy).  I know it may sound ridiculous too, but unfortunately gaining approval is high on my personality list.  I learned this information recently because I took a class at work on my personality type.  I hate that trait about myself.  It causes me a lot more trouble than it’s worth sometimes.

     I do have GOOD news though.  Just this week…I believe God is starting to place the right people in my life to help me pursue my musical dream.  As a result of my American Idol dismissal, I already know of 2 people willing to help me achieve my goals in music.  One is a friend, musician, song writer, and musical savvy guru who is going to help me through the beginnings of starting my own singing career.  The other person, a Facebook connection, own’s their own studio and is willing to listen to me, give me a chance, and help me out where they can (recording, playing an instrument on my future cd, etc…).  Both of these are Godly people, I believe, who want nothing but God’s plan to pan out in my life and in their own (I hope I can be as much of a help to them as they will be to me).  I believe they will both be of great assistance to me. 

     So now I must wait.  I hate this part because I feel like I’ve already wasted 10 years of my singing life for nothing.  I should have been trying to pursue this years ago.  Although, things probably would have been different;  I would have been different.  I’m just not a very patient person when it comes to something I want (just ask my hubby).  I want to do this as a career.  I want to sing full-time, make cd’s, and travel.  I want to inspire someone to follow their dreams, do what they love, and worship Jesus through it all because that’s what I want to do in life. 

     The first thing I’m going to do is try and finish the songs I’m writing so that I can make a demo.  That is going to take a little time, money, and some resources.  I want to do this the way God wants.  I want God’s way and my way to line up and be on the same page.  Please pray for me in the weeks ahead.  Pray that I will have guidance from the Holy Spirit to do what is right and pleasing to him and pray that I have inspiration for my songs.  I need to finish them quickly and I know God can help me achieve that goal.  I love you guys so much!  Thanks for staying with me even after the excitement with American Idol is over.  The fat lady hasn’t sang yet, so hold on tight and enjoy the ride with me!

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